{"id":10477,"date":"2012-01-31T00:06:56","date_gmt":"2012-01-31T08:06:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/?p=10477"},"modified":"2012-01-31T00:06:56","modified_gmt":"2012-01-31T08:06:56","slug":"mba-jane","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/10477","title":{"rendered":"Introducing MBA Jane"},"content":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\tAllow me to introduce Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In her former life …<\/span><\/p>\n

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…\u00a0she ended up\u00a0naked on eBay, little more than a discarded plaything. Since then, she\u2019s been turning things around and, well, here she is, a permanent part of Raising Jane. Take it from here, MBA Jane.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0-MaryJane<\/span><\/p>\n

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MBA Jane confession: It didn\u2019t just die, I put a stake through its bleeping heart \u2014 my PDA high-resolution touchscreen mobile-optimized high-speed data access Wi-Fi broadband smartphone. But not without hesitation and self-doubt. Not until 10 o\u2018clock this morning when I finally decided, no, KNEW I wanted to start earning Merit Badges.<\/p>\n

KNEW I wanted to get those letters, MBA, attached to my name rather than \u201ceBay\/nude\/used\/1 bid.\u201d<\/p>\n

KNEW I needed to become more well-rounded, I mean more endowed, I mean LESS endowed but more schooled in the arts, handwork, you know, life skills.<\/p>\n

KNEW that \u201cBecoming Jane\u201d would become me. Just KNEW.<\/p>\n

New me.<\/p>\n

I patiently poured over the requirements<\/a> and the hundreds of pages of accomplished MBAers<\/a> that I wanted to emulate. And that\u2019s when it happened, when I did it. I reached over and TuRnED OFF my smartie-pants phone. No more txts today U no. Farmgirl U would be my new MOO (mode of operation). Who nu a milkmaid badge even existed? (Make that NEW. I\u2019m weaning myself off txt speak, er, TEXT speak.)<\/p>\n

I\u2019d already dropped my classes at one of the big 10. Father threatened to pull his funding when he learned I\u2019d joined the local food co-op instead of rushing Delta Kappa Omega Pi sorority, a long-time tradition in my family.<\/p>\n

Like whatever.<\/p>\n

Guess I was tired of people whispering words like \u201cpretty\u201d and \u201cditzy\u201d whenever I left a room.<\/p>\n

Real pi<\/strong>es! Omega<\/strong> oils. A sisterhood of farmgirls!! Now, there\u2019s a rush for U. (YOU. Sorry again. It\u2019s going to take me a while. Bare with me. I mean bear. Yes, there\u2019s been a bit of that, too. But naked cupcakes are a healthy thing, right?)<\/p>\n

Making a life out of the latest in hand-held Android iOS embedded Linux Maemo and MeeGo gadgetry was going to make this Jane a dull girl in the long run. Nice call, Watson, I told myself.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m IN … hook, line and sinker (there’s even a fishing badge). Talk about a rush. I\u2019ve never met a goosebump I didn\u2019t like.<\/p>\n

Next week, my parents come for a visit and I\u2019m going to Light the Way<\/a>! (It\u2019s a badge, Madge.)\u00a0After that, I churn the corner to better butter and write my first op-ed piece: Homemade Butter is the New Black.<\/p>\n

[Spoiler alert: Don’t worry – MBA Jane is here for the long haul and nothing bad ever happens. Her parents come around. She travels. Runs for mayor. Starts a business. Dates.]<\/span><\/p>\n

\"MBA-Jane_0259-r\"\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Allow me to introduce Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In her former life … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[356,363,548,566],"class_list":["post-10477","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gladsome_sisters","tag-girlgab-com","tag-gladsome-sisters","tag-maryjanesfarm-farmgirl-sisterhood","tag-mba-jane"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10477","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10477"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10477\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10477"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10477"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10477"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}