{"id":25935,"date":"2012-12-02T00:07:46","date_gmt":"2012-12-02T08:07:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/?p=25935"},"modified":"2012-12-02T00:07:46","modified_gmt":"2012-12-02T08:07:46","slug":"mba-jane-lend-a-hand-to-families","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/25935","title":{"rendered":"Lend a Hand to Families"},"content":{"rendered":"

\t\t\t\tThe adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program<\/span><\/a>, now with 4,649 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far\u20146,500 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! MJ<\/span><\/p>\n

Wondering who I am? I\u2019m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my<\/span> former life<\/a> \u2026<\/p>\n

A much-anticipated opportunity came this week. I was so excited. A girlfriend of mine, a real farm chick, a bosom buddy, one of my besties, had a baby! I could finally earn my Lend a Hand to Families <\/a>badge! I\u2019d been waiting for pestilence and plague, someone to fall sick or\u00a0have\u00a0a tragic injury,\u00a0anything<\/strong> to give me the chance to help someone out.<\/p>\n

I know. Even as a joke, it falls flat. My sacrificial nature and priorities are one of the best things about Yours Truly. Along with my humility, of course.<\/p>\n

So, I waited by the phone with bated breath, anticipating the …<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

wee babe\u2019s arrival. I was like a nervous father, an excited grandmother, a big sister! I was a wreck, really. I paced around and ate more than my fair share of organic, free trade, dark chocolate. For the antioxidants, of course. Then I poured a glass of local, organic Merlot. For the reversitol, of course. This birthing process was aging me!<\/p>\n

I tell you what. I don\u2019t know what was taking so long, but finally the phone rang. It was a strapping boy! I considered passing out cigars, but I\u2019m not a big fan, so I ate\u00a0more chocolate.<\/p>\n

I could hardly wait to get over there and help out. I had my gift basket all ready, full of handmade burp rags, cloth diapers (okay, okay, those are one and the same, but still), a pair of hand-knitted booties, and a onesie with I Love Auntie Jane <\/em>printed in puffy paint. I told her I\u2019d be right over and she told me to wait a week.<\/p>\n

Huh? Seriously? I had some serious baby snuggling to do, not to mention the fact I planned to bring the Tater Tot Casserole in my oven. With Mr. Wonderful around, it was not going to last a week.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Okay, I grudgingly agreed. One week. And then I\u2019m descending! And helping, by golly!<\/p>\n

My week passed, slow as molasses in January. That baby was gonna be a toddler before I got to see him. Sigh. I should have started his college fund by now. Maybe I can teach him to drive.<\/p>\n

My Tater Tot Casserole long gone, I packed up some Taco Soup and Cornbread instead and off I went. To help! I almost felt like I needed a cape and maybe some tights.<\/p>\n

Turns out, I did a lot less baby snuggling and gift unwrapping, and a lot more dish washing, laundry folding, sweeping, mopping, and more laundry folding. Man, I had no idea babies were such slobs! He is cute, though. I got to play This Little Piggy in between sock folding and unloading the dishwasher. He totally smiled at me, too, although his mama said it was only gas. I suppose she would know \u2026 but I still think it was a smile.<\/p>\n

When I got home, I was pretty exhausted just seeing what the little mama goes through daily. I\u2019d say I earned this badge, and maybe there should be one for procreating? Just sayin\u2019. She deserves a badge for all aspects of it.\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 4,649 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far\u20146,500 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! MJ Wondering … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a> Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[363,548,566,574],"class_list":["post-25935","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gladsome_sisters","tag-gladsome-sisters","tag-maryjanesfarm-farmgirl-sisterhood","tag-mba-jane","tag-merit-badge-awardees"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25935","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25935"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25935\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25935"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25935"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.raisingjane.org\/journal\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25935"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}