The Rest of the Story

Happy Monday morning my dear friends!!!! Here’s what I’m hoping will be a fun exchange between us. Can you help me write the ending to my “story” (adventure, yarn, whopper, taradiddle, mare’s nest, fabrication, concoction)? It can be three words. Or many. A smiley face without any ending at all. A total dud, fall flat on its face idea. (Oh, the embarrassment.) Here goes my first attempt. But wait. My future alert is this: I hope to sometimes drift into Garrison Keillor territory with a yarn or two. Maybe the occasional fable of yore. Maybe a pretend game of “you’re about to cowgirl up your milk cow when up drives …”

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It’s happened before. But this time, she does it in an even larger group setting. She’s someone you care about a lot, enough so, you can’t bear the thought of correcting her privately, let alone publicly. What’s a girl to do?

Send her an anonymous note? You consider her reaction and embarrassment and that idea stops you dead in your tracks. You begin to weigh the consequences. When she finds out she’s had it wrong all along, she’ll spend time trying to replay all the many times she’s done it and who was there to witness it. It might affect her confidence. It might make her retreat. If she retreats only a tiny amount, that’s never a good thing. Worse yet, maybe she’ll retreat from you if she even suspects you’re the one …

“Silly. Just tell her the very next time it happens. You’re over-thinking it. On second thought, maybe I’m guilty of something similar and no one’s ever told me. Now, this is ruining MY confidence. This is starting to be too much …  

Say nothing …  

Oh, for heaven’s sake, just say it! Tell her point blank …  

No, don’t. Who do I think I am anyway? Little Miss Blunder Director Corrector?  She’s only a dear acquaintance, not a BFF … 

I got it! Tell a close family member of hers so they can tell her … “

Never mind. That is WAY too manipulative and underhanded.

But. BUT. Every time she says …

“A washed (not watched) pot never boils,” you want to crawl under the nearest loose tile. For HER sake.

Can you finish the rest of this story? (Happy endings are good.)

 

  1. Winnie Nielsen says:

    I have a hard time with this one because I find myself getting caught up in the worry that , who am I to decide how a person should be? If she isn’t hurting someone, then let the rest of the world draw their own conclusions about her quirks. The question is , am I the one embarrassed because I think it not correct? If others blow it off and not me, then the problem is mine and not hers. My take is just tell myself to not take myself so seriously and let the person be who she is. Washed pot and all!

  2. Elizabeth says:

    Then you realize it’s your pal’s adorable accent from yesteryear resurfacing as a glimpse from the past…?
    And decide it “all comes out in the watch” after-all;-)

  3. Karen says:

    Why can’t I see that her malapropisms are part of her charm? After all, in the scheme of human foibles, it is endearing. What is my problem?

    Why do I fondly remember that boyfriend of old who called geraniums “Geronimos” and Sweet Allysum plants “Lisa Breath” but my skin crawls when a friend washes that never-to-boil pot?

    My grandmother would know what to do if she were here. If only I were more like her.

    It if funny how one woman’s simple mistake has led me to remember an old beau and yearn for my grandmother who is sorely missed.

    Maybe what I should say to my friend, the next time I see her, is “thank you”.

  4. Sheri says:

    The next time she said it, I would casually say , “My mom would always say that a Watched pot never boils but silly me will always watch it anyway. It seems like it’s even worse when I’m in a hurry. Isn’t it funny how those old sayings apply to so many things!”. And then, I would never give it a second thought if she continued to say it the same. It’s such a minor thing and I love her more than wanting to embarress her. After all, we all have our little quirks!

  5. Kristi says:

    I have a dear friend who always tells me she has “come to a consensus” over a problem, and I have to giggle inside every time. She must have many parts. I don’t know why she never can “come to a conclusion.” I told her about it once, a long time ago, but she hasn’t changed, and I don’t want to change her.

  6. Mary phillips says:

    Maybe I should just go the whole 8 yards and tell her it’s not “lick” the bucket, either!

  7. Grace says:

    Even though the habit makes you cringe inside, you also smile just a little knowing that the flicker of confusion she sees on everyone’s face when she uses the wrong word is one of the ways that she makes sure that people are paying attention. 🙂

  8. Emily says:

    You play like Andy Taylor, the Sheriff of Mayberry, and with a smile and a great dose of humility, avoid even thinking about correcting the Barney Fife in your friend. (Barney, if you do not know, was frequently mispronouncing words and misquoting sayings.) Especially do this if your friend is the humble type herself.

    If your friend is a pride peacock, always looking to be right and correct others, it might serve her right to be put in her place. As unfriendly as that might seem, it also wouldn’t be a bad choice just letting her go on embarrassing herself is she is the proud type. I’ve spent many a time in company with what my grandfather referred to as “Know-ies”. . . you know, the sort of people who know everything and believe you know nothing. Sometimes it’s easier to just sit back and let those sort run on and run off everybody around them.

    But a humble friend, innocent of such behavior. . . just let her be. Chances are she’s beloved by those around her, and they accept her wholly despite her linguistic imperfections.

    And if it’s bothering you THAT MUCH that she keeps saying “a washed pot. . .”, then perhaps you’re taking life just too darn seriously. Just sayin’.

    (Of course, the “you” in this doesn’t really mean “you”. . . it means the “you” who is discussing these things in her own head. No offense meant whatsoever! This is getting complicated, haha!)

  9. Judy says:

    Maybe she’s deaf. My husband is and you should hear the words he sings to songs on the radio. Just lol a lot.

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