Going Green Merit Badge, Expert Level

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 5,892 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—8,416 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! MJ 

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life   

For this week’s Cleaning Up/Going Green Expert Level Merit Badge, I was pretty happy with the way things were going around my house. Green? You betcha! Everywhere you looked, you could see the rewards and fruits of my labors. Not that it was too laborious; going green is easier than you might think.

My cleaners were homemade, my food was organic, my paint was non-toxic, and everything was looking tip top, ship shape, in Bristol fashion. *

*I may be watching a tad too much British telly lately. I mean, television.

There were only a couple items on my Expert Level Merit Badge that needed to be accomplished:

  • a clothesline
  • a lending library of any how-to books relating to going green
  • spending some time at a friend’s house, helping her abode become more earth friendly

First off, it turned out that that weird-looking post in the ground in my backyard was not simply a place to tie your doggy when you needed to curb his wandering habits. Nope, it was a clothesline! Well, you could have knocked me over with feather. I knew it looked sorta familiar (must have seen one on a period piece on the telly). I got myself over to the hardware store immediately and purchased myself some clothespins (turns out they’re not just for crafts or for holding your chip bag closed. Ahem).

I was flabbergasted at how yummy my organic cotton sheets smelled after one morning in the sunshine! I am not kidding, my little honeybees, they were sweeter scented than anything Downey could ever bottle. I slept like a log that night. Chainsaw included, I admit sheepishly.

Next, I organized my little stack of books (and magazines) and let my friends and family know they were available for borrowing. Two weeks at a time, no renewals. Please fill out this little form, including credit card number, social security, and mother’s maiden name. What? So, I’m a little over-protective of my books … I can’t imagine why no one has visited Jane’s Lending Library yet. It’s a puzzle.

Anyway, after that (and after a short siesta on my floral bed of happiness), I wandered over to Midge’s house. I figured she needed some sprucing up in the ol’ green department, and boy, was I right. That doll is still stuck in the ’50s, let me tell you. Of course, it’s not strictly her fault; Mattel discontinued her in the ’60s. (Reproductions don’t count. My Midge could never be reproduced – pshaw!)

She was happy to let me do my thing, so to speak, and we spent a cheerful afternoon throwing out toxic cleansers and scrubs, letting the kids try out my homemade deodorant and toothpaste (good thing they’re organic and tummy friendly, cuz the youngest kept trying to eat them), and pulling out some nasty old carpet in the entryway. (Can you say, hardwood floors beneath? Blimey!)

At the end of our day, I had earned my newest badge, plus a sense of satisfaction and an even deeper friendship. A most excellent way to spend a day, indeed.

Pip pip, cheerio!


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